Thursday, January 8, 2015

Rerun Article: Sarah's Wild Drive-Off!

The three Dilophosaurus (left and center background), Mr. Fish (front left), Mr. Gregor (center left), Sarah Bus Stop Guy (center right), and the police (left) standing in front of Mr. Peter and his truck in the background.
Here in Riverville, New York, some people can be a little crazy. And this craziness runs in the family. Just this Monday, the P for Prize Toy Company was driving through Riverville to deliver some new toys to a nearby toy store. Little did they know they had a tag-a-long: Sarah Bus Stop Guy. My junior photographer, Daniel P. Smithwater and I know Sarah very well, so we had to hop in on this news. Who’s Sarah Bus Stop Guy? Well, she’s the 12 year old daughter of the Mr. Bus Stop Guy and they are locals of Riverville. (I’m sure the last name sounds a little weird, but rumor has it that it has something to do with Mr. Bus Stop Guy’s previous occupations) Mr. Bus Stop Guy is a little cuckoo you see. So this weirdness must have been passed on to her daughter. So as the P for Prize truck went driving down the road, Sarah opened the trunk so a few things fell out. So when the driver, named Mr. Peter, noticed something was going on back there, he went out to investigate . . . and this is when after he closed the trunk, Sarah hopped into the driver’s seat and drove away! “At first I didn’t know what was happening to my expensive truck,” said Mr. Peter. “I thought I forgot to put the break on until I saw a little figure in the driver’s seat.” Mr. Peter called the police and they were on the hunt. But they couldn’t find her. Fortunately, two other locals named Mr. Fred Fish and Mr. Gregor (he was on the front page a few months prior) saw a large truck driving like crazy down the road and realized that someone they knew was inside! “I knew Sarah was crazy,” says Mr. Fish, “But I had no idea that she was that crazy.” Mr. Gregor said, “After calling the police, all I could do was hope that Sarah would finally learn her lesson after this escapade!” Unfortunately, Sarah was better at driving a truck than you’d think. She just drove around the curvy mountain roads. The police even had trouble getting hold of her. What could anybody do? Well, it just so happened that that day, the Dilophosaurus (Die-LOF-oh-SOAR-us) trio from Animal Adventures Inc. was taking a walk that day on those mountain roads. For those of you who don’t know, Animal Adventures Inc. (aka AAI) is a large company run by Nigel Milligan who is famous for films such as “Animal Face-Off: Lion vs. Tiger” and “Animal Face-Off: Velociraptor vs. Protoceratops”. Now AAI also has an institute called Animal Adventures Institute where they clone extinct creatures such as dinosaurs (and yes, the animals are taught fluid English). So three Dilophosaurus (two males and one female) were taking a walk when they saw Sarah driving the truck down the road. So the three dinosaurs got to action, they ran toward the truck and hitched a ride. They then managed to force Sarah out of the driver’s seat, take the wheel and safely drive the vehicle back to its owner. The female Dilophosaurus, named Dilo, is quoted to saying, “Sarah is a nut-head alright. Believe me, we’ve known Sarah for years, but I never thought she’d do this! Fortunately, we were able to force her out of the driver’s seat. And get the truck back to the owner.” When I asked how the Dilophosaurus how she managed to drive a truck without fully-opposable thumbs, she simply said, “It was ‘interesting’.” After getting the truck back, the Dilophosaurus were each given a free chew toy and Sarah was put in time out. When I asked Sarah about how she felt about her situation, she replied, “Mr. Smiley, you’re so nosy! Bye!” Well, I just hope Sarah learned a lesson from this, because I firmly believe, she’s on Santa’s naughty list this year for sure!


Written by: Mr. Smiley
Photographer: Daniel P. Smithwater
Edited by: Christian Ryan

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