Thursday, October 4, 2012

Elephant Outbreak!

The elephants wrecking the Spooky Day Parade
The morning started normally as my photographer, Daniel P. Smithwater went to go get a report on the Spooky Day Parade. What is the Spooky Day Parade? Well, it is essentially a pre-Halloween parade (A Christian like myself doesn’t really participate in Halloween, considering its deep roots in Pagan customs). This parade has gotten very scary in deed over the years. The costumes get creepier and creepier every time the parade is held. And worst of all, the people in scary costumes often scare little kids. This is terrible considering that it’s normally such a nice day outside. Then, as the parade started to march down the road, Daniel and I were in for a big surprise. Suddenly, coming from the opposite direction, was a herd of African Elephants from the New York Africa Zoo was stampeding down the street and towards the parade. The people ran in all direction, but for some odd reason, the elephants seemed to charge more at the people doing the parade. They went over the floats and used their tusks to tear them apart. Confetti flew around everywhere. Daniel and I would have left with the other spectators, but why miss out on such a good story. And besides, Daniel wouldn’t have gotten the picture above. One of the women spectators said, “AHHHHHH!!!” In other words, we didn’t get much out of her. Most of the Spooky Day Parade marchers escaped before the elephants could hurt them, but two of the spooky dudes got trampled by Martha the elephant. They didn’t get killed, but instead got Floaticus Maximus. This non-life threatening disease makes the person bloat up like a balloon. The two men had to stay in the hospital for two months until they finally shrank back to normal size. No one is quite sure how the elephants escaped their cages. But zookeeper Manny Minlens has a theory. She said, “I’m not exactly sure how the elephants escaped. But they have been playing with the door lock lately. Perhaps they finally figured out how to unlock their own cage. It looks like we’ll have to put a new lock on.” Scientists aren’t sure why the elephants targeted the marchers, but they think it’s because some of the marchers had been eating peanuts, mangoes, bananas and other fruits before marching. The smell of those foods was probably on the floats and attracted the elephants who may have not liked the music the marchers were playing and so they tore up the floats. The elephants were returned to their enclosure at the zoo and it looks like the Spooky Day Parade is cancelled forever. Hooray!

Written by: Mr. Smiley
Photographer: Daniel P. Smithwater
Edited by: Christian Ryan

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