New Animal Face-Off Series Beams Success

These are all the animals from the new series!

A lot of you probably already know that my good friend Nigel Milligan is the CEO of Animal Adventures Inc. (AAI.). An “under-business” (if you will) of AAI. is Animal Adventures Studios (AAS). This is where the company makes movies and TV shows. Their latest and so far biggest project yet has recently been released on television. This series is called Animal Face-Off. “After completing our second short, ‘Jurassic Park: The Game – Triceratops Troubles’, I was eager to get on with bigger projects,” Nigel says. “So I thought an Animal Face-Off series was a great idea.” This series is quite different from most other documentary series you’ve seen. There are nine episodes in season one. These episodes are:

1. Lion vs. Tiger
2. Hippo vs. Bull Shark
3. Elephant vs. Rhino
4. Velociraptor vs. Protoceratops
5. Velociraptor vs. Ankylosaur
6. Tyrannosaurus vs. Ankylosaurus
7. Tarantula vs. Scorpion
8. Tyrannosaurus vs. Spinosaurus
9. Special: Battle at Kruger

Each episode (with the exception of the special) starts out with a little introduction to each animal. Then the narrator, another friend of mine named Christian Ryan, tells the audience the strengths and weaknesses of each animals in the face-off. Finally the face-off is revealed, and the endings can become quite a surprise to some viewers! Finally, the narrator then tells us why the winner won the face-off. The series mainly positive reviews from a wide range of critics and as of January 24, 2013, each episode has had a lot of views:

Lion vs. Tiger - 1,301 views

Hippo vs. Bull Shark - 1004 views

Elephant vs. Rhino - 921 views

Velociraptor vs. Protoceratops - 484 views

Velociraptor vs. Ankylosaur - 408 views

Tyrannosaurus vs. Ankylosaurus - 328 views

Tarantula vs. Scorpion - 667 views

Tyrannosaurus vs. Spinosaurus - 395 views

Special: Battle at Kruger - 285 views

The series ran from September 13, 2012-December 31, 2012. After a successful series such as this, some might be wondering what Nigel plans to do next. So that was what I asked him. “I like to stay ahead of things,” says Nigel. “So well before the Animal Face-Off series was finished, we were also working on a documentary series called ‘Planet of the Dinosaurs’. In this series, we will be taking viewers back in time to show them what dinosaurs were really like after the Fall of Man and how new fossil evidence is revealing some of the most amazing creatures that God ever assembled. I mean, lots of the dinosaurs in the series were only discovered in the past few years. Thanks to scientific advancements, we’ve been able to unlock mysteries that have puzzled scientists for decades and go deeper into fossils than ever before; and thanks to the invention of the Time-A-Tron we are now able to literally go back in time and film the amazing creatures in their natural element. At this very moment, my film crew is back in prehistoric Wyoming, filming a few days in the life of one of the most terrible killers of the Jurassic lands: Allosaurus!” I then asked Nigel if his series is the first series to use time travel to film the prehistoric animals. “No, we aren’t. The first people to do so were with the BBC channel where they went back in time to film a series called “Walking with Dinosaurs.” They went on to do other popular series such as “Walking with Beasts” a sequel to WWD and “Walking with Monsters” a prequel to WWD. Other series using time travel include: Prehistoric Park, When Dinosaurs Roamed America, Dinosaur Planet, Dinosaur Revolution and most recently, Planet Dinosaur. And my series, Planet of the Dinosaurs is the next great dinosaur documentary series. With the Lord’s blessing, this series will be a huge success and will help shed light on some of the lesser known animals of the Mesozoic lands (by “Mesozoic”, he is referring to the lands the dinosaurs lived in, not the fictional time periods that secularists say dinosaurs lived in).” Before I ended the interview, I had one last question to ask: what are some of the animals to expect in this new series? “Well, while we will have episodes devoted to famous dinosaurs – T. rex, Triceratops and Velociraptor – we plan to shed light on other less familiar species, such as the intriguing Spinosaurus, Rugops, Guanlong, Gigantoraptor and etc.” This series is in the works and is scheduled to be released sometime in April. I can’t wait!

PS: To see the new series, click here: Animal Face-Off.

Written by: Mr. Smiley

Photographer: Daniel P. Smithwater

Edited by: Christian Ryan

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Carnival Baby Saved . . . By an Umbilical!

Mr. Bob (right) and Mrs. Cheri Mitchell (left), the baby, named Junie (center) and the Carnival Man (far right) all had an interesting time at the Riverville Country Carnival!

Carnivals can be very, very fun! But the only problem I have with them is that they can literally drink the money out of your pocket. Carnivals also hold lots of personal memories for me too, like the time I got stuck in the cotton candy machine . . . but that’s another story! Anyways, the Riverville Country Carnival always opens in middle January, despite it being so cold and snowy. This carnival is like so many around the world. They have all the typical stuff – you know, roller coasters, bouncy rides and houses, waterslides (although they end up freezing a lot in winter) and etc. Well, this story starts when Mr. Bob and Cheri Mitchell decided to visit the Riverville Country Carnival and go on one of the most exhilarating rides: the Oompa Loompa Loopy, a ride based on the film Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Now this would be fine on normal occasions – the ride was a very safe ride. But this wasn’t a normal occasion because Cheri was nine months into her pregnancy! Normally pregnant women don’t go on roller coasters because they tend to run into . . . “complications”. However, this couple decided to take their chances. So the couple went onto the ride. The ride went on without a hitch until Cheri felt a sudden muscle movement . . . the movement that all mothers, all around the world, since almost the beginning of time have known the meaning of: the baby was coming! Unfortunately, the roller coaster was already in full swing when the baby was ready to be born. “It all happened so fast,” says Bob. “One moment we were just enjoying ourselves on a ride, the next moment my wife was ready to have a baby!” I, your faithful reporter, and my trusty junior photographer, Daniel P. Smithwater just so happened to be at the carnival at the time and I noticed a man on the roller coaster bending down next to a woman and I thought I the sound of a crying baby. I then realized that the woman was in the process of having her baby! I then saw one of the carnival men looking at the roller coaster; he was apparently as shocked as I was. I tried to get his name but he simply wanted to be known as the “Carnival Man”. “I don’t know why a pregnant woman would go on that ride!” says the Carnival Man. “It’s got crazy stuff: upside-downs and loopy loops and a ton of other stuff that wouldn’t be good for a pregnant woman.” The Carnival Man didn’t have a net with him, so I loaned him the one of the nets I won in one of the carnival contests. Finally, Cheri’s baby popped out when the roller coaster car started to go upside-down! The baby suddenly fell from Cheri and started dangling in midair – the reason it didn’t fall was that Bob was holding the dear thing from the umbilical cord. The baby apparently has having the time of its life, because as it was dangling, I’m pretty sure I heard it say, “WEEEE!” The umbilical cord suddenly broke and the baby fell. The Carnival Man and I were below on the ground, trying to catch the little baby with our nets when the baby plunked into the net of the Carnival Man (see? once again I, Mr. Smiley is the hero because I lent the Carnival Man my net!). After the ride ended, I had an opportunity to interview Cheri and see why on earth she decided to ride that crazy roller coaster in the first place! Cheri is quoted for saying, “I was getting bored, so my husband and I decided to do something fun and risky at the same time! I think it was a blast!” As soon as the baby plunked into the Carnival Man’s net, he shouted, “IT’S A GIRL!” so as you would expect, the parents were very excited. How does this amazing story end? Well, after this escapade, the new family decided to take a calm trip to Hawaii, the baby was named Junie, and the Carnival Man had something to say about the carnival rules, “I am officially adding a rule that states: “NO PREGNANT WOMEN ON ROLLER COASTERS!!!”

Written by: Mr. Smiley

Photographer: Daniel P. Smithwater

Edited by: Christian Ryan

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A Dinosaurian Misidentification

On the outside, a baby hadrosaur (left) and baby T. rex (right) don't look that similar, but  when only fossil bone fragments are discovered, misidentifications are common.

You may recall that a few months ago on the Tricera-Clash article, we spoke of the find of five Tyrannosaurus, two adults and three young ones, in one location and a Triceratops. But recent studies prove differently. My photographer, Daniel P. Smithwater and I went to Dr. Samuel and Dr. Indiana Adamson (the paleontologists who initially made the discovery) to get the full scoop on the story. “Last year, we thought we had five tyrannosaurs,” says Dr. Samuel. “But this was put in question when we took a closer look at the fossils of the baby tyrannosaurs. When we first dug them up from the ground, they were still encased in solid rock . . . here at the lab we cleaned that rock off using special equipment and finally we are thinking that things were not at all what they seemed.” After taking the rock off of the “baby tyrannosaur” specimens, the paleontologists looked at the creatures’ heads and noticed something – a duckbill! Tyrannosaurs don’t have duckbills. “When we saw the duckbills, we knew that we had been wrong before,” says Dr. Indiana. “Once we took an even closer look at the skeleton, we realized that indeed the whole body is quite different from a tyrannosaur. No, the fossils we have are from a trio of baby hadrosaurs!” Baby hadrosaurs, or duckbilled dinosaurs, are very different from tyrannosaurs, as you can plainly see in the picture above. Dr. Indiana continued, “The fossil adult T. rex however, are really T. rex. So at least we have that straight. This is not the first fossil mistake paleontologists have made. In fact, the history of paleontology is littered with mistakes!” And right Dr. Indiana is! The history of paleontology is littered with dinosaur mistakes and misidentifications. Here are a few examples:

• Brontosaurus, one of the most famous of all dinosaurs, never existed; it was actually made up of the head of a camarasaur and the body of an apatosaur. While both are long-necked dinosaurs, they are very different.
• A duckbilled dinosaur called Anatotitan never existed either, it is actually a member of the Edmontosaur genus.
• A pterosaur (or flying reptile, which is not a dinosaur by the way) leg bone was thought to have been found in the Middle east. If it was a leg bone, this pterosaur might have had a wingspan of over 70 feet! However the “leg bone” was discovered to be, not from a pterosaur, but it was actually a petrified tree trunk!
• One of the most shocking of all is when a paleontologist put the fossil bones of a swimming reptile called Elasmosaurus (not a dinosaur) and thought that it had a short neck and a very long tail. Well, he thought the bones were an “irregular fit” so he had one of his friends expect the fossils and he found the problem – the head was on the wrong end!

One of the most recent possible misidentifications is that of another tyrannosaur named “Jane”. Jane is a tyrannosaur, but scientists aren’t sure which type. She looks very different from an adult T. rex so originally she was thought to be a different species and called the new species “Nanotyrannus”. Now this has been put in question and some scientists now believe that “Nanotyrannus” is actually a juvenile T. rex. Other scientists disagree because they believe that “Nanotyrannus” has too many differences from T. rex to be a juvenile T. rex because there were more differences than is expected for a maturing tyrannosaur. So far, only two specimens of “Nanotyrannus” have been found. Until more bones are found, Jane’s fossils will still elude us!

Written by: Mr. Smiley

Photographer: Daniel P. Smithwater

Edited by: Christian Ryan

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An Animalistic Movie Protest

(From top to bottom) Nathan, Koda, Kingo, Thomas, and Gordon have a lot to say about the way their species are depicted in movies

Animals and cinema: they go together really well. Animals have been in the movies ever since I was knee-high to a snow cone. I’m only kidding! Animals have been in movies way before I was even born. Way before my mom’s mom was even born. With nothing overly exciting happening here in Riverville, New York (and that’s really rare around these parts), my junior photographer Daniel P. Smithwater and I thought this would be the perfect topic for this week. Now where was I . . . oh, I remember. Animals have been in movies for a long time. But sometimes, especially in a lot of those older movies, the movie makers weren’t happy with the animals they wanted in the movie: they wanted bigger, nastier, “badder” animals. So therefore they do a little “creative licensing.” Moviegoers love these “badder” animals . . . but what about the animals themselves? Well, the animals at Animal Adventures Inc. (who speak fluid English by the way) have quite a bit to say on this topic. So this week, we interviewed five different species of animals to get their opinions on these exaggerations. Also be sure to check out the pictures of the movies that these animals are portrayed in!

Our first interviewee is Nathan, a sharp-toothed Great White Shark. At 15 feet in length, he isn’t the biggest of the Great Whites, but he’s still pretty large. No doubt the most famous portrayal of a shark anywhere is in the Jaws trilogy. “I do not condone the movie Jaws,” says Nathan. “Or the sequel of Jaws, or the third Jaws. Actually, ‘not condoning’ is an understatement – I hate that movie!” When asked why he dislikes it so much, his response was, “That movie stereotyped all of us sharks! I mean, in the movie, Jaws is, for one thing, much larger than the real Great Whites, and he is portrayed as a ferocious, blood-thirsty monster that eats humans. There is a lot wrong with that picture! First of all, I can’t stand the taste of human flesh. I don’t know a single Great White that does. It’s a common misconception that all sharks are man-eaters, and despite being the largest flesh-eating sharks alive today, we don’t eat people. From watching the movie, people think that we love eating people. And that’s not true to say the least!” I then asked why sharks attack people so much. Nathan is then quoted for saying, “Because they resemble seals and sea lions, our favorite prey. I’ve never been in the wild but from what I recall, from below the water, people who float on surf boards with their arms extended resemble a seal or sea lion, so therefore we attack.” My last question to Nathan was why people seeing the movie Jaws makes such a bad impression on sharks everywhere. He says, “Because humans are hardheads, they believe everything they see. If they see a shark eating people on a movie, they believe that real Great White sharks are man-eaters. And since the release of Jaws, people have killed sharks by the millions, just out of fear. I mean, we’re busy minding out own business and these silly people come by and start killing us! In actuality, more sharks are killed by people than people are killed by sharks! Not to mention, the third Jaws takes place in Sea World! Now isn’t Sea World all about conservation? Then why in the world does the third Jaws take place in Sea World?!? I’ll never know. All I know is that that crazy movie trilogy is about the worst thing ever put on television and I out to . . .” Nathan had a lot more to say of course, but if I wrote everything he said, this article would take till next Christmas to read!

The movie that gave sharks a bad name! Most (if not all) attacks on people by Great White Sharks are by mistake!

The next animal we interviewed was Koda, the Timber Wolf. I found Timber to be much more . . . “controlled” than Nathan (no offense, Nathan!), so it was easy to get right to the point. “We wolves just have a bad rap,” Koda says. “Not only are we portrayed badly in movies, but also in classic stories. Who’s the one who gets in trouble for destroying the houses of three little pigs? The wolf. Who gets in trouble for almost eating Little Red Riding Hood’s Grandma? The wolf. I mean, because people are so quick to believe everything they hear, they think we wolves are evil animals.” Koda went on to explain that wolves are often persecuted in the wild for eating sheep. “It is true that sometimes wolves eat sheep,” he says, “but farmers should really invest in keeping their sheep and other livestock safe instead of grabbing a gun. I mean, we’re really way more scared of humans than they are of us. With the exception of wolves with rabies, we respect humans, after all they’re made in God’s image! I believe that humans should respect us as well and give us space in the wild. They should just give us room to live in the wild, replace that cheap picket fence keeping the sheep in and replace it with a more protective fence and humans and wolves can live together in harmony.”

The Big Bad Wolf at one of the Three Little Pig's Door

If wolves have a bad rap, check out the gorilla! Kingo the Mountain Gorilla has a “few” things to say about his portrayal in the movie King Kong. “In the movie King Kong,” Kingo starts, “we are portrayed as this 25-foot tall behemoth with sharp teeth, strong muscles, and a heart of violence. Sure we may have strong muscles and sharp teeth, but we’ve kept our pre-fall (the time before Adam and Eve sinned) diet – plants and fruits. Also, no gorilla or any other primate in the history of the planet has ever gotten that big! The largest primate ever to exist, and a close relation of mine, named Gigantopithicus was a big bloke, but he was only nine feet tall. Nowhere near the size of that fictional King Kong. Also, we aren’t nearly as violent as the movie suggests, and we don’t go yanking human women around like Kong does in the movie either.” I then asked why gorillas got such a bad rap in the first place. His response was, “Well, people are very, very superstitious. So when the first African explorers saw us, they immediately must have thought we were violent monsters and a lot of people didn’t bother to find out if that was true. Nothing could be further from the truth regarding our violence. The only times we get feisty is when we are provoked. Other than that, we’re as cool as cucumbers.” I then asked about their portrayal in Planet of the Apes. He says, “We were a little violent in there too. Now a movie I do like is Mighty Joe Young. Sure, the gorilla is too big in there as well, but he’s much more like a real animal than a Hollywood monster. I’d recommend that movie.”

King Kong, the gorilla with a fictional temper!

Our second to last animal is none other than Thomas, a Tyrannosaurus rex. T. rex has been in numerous films, books, games and etc. So I decided to see if he was also getting a bad rap. “I wouldn’t call it a ‘bad rap,” says Thomas. “I’d say it’s more of a mere misconception. Because it is true that a wild Tyrannosaurus can be a vicious animal, but we aren’t monsters like we are sometimes portrayed in movies. One major misconception is that we are always hungry and will eat anything that moves at any given time. That’s not true! In the wild, we only kill when we’re hungry or when we’re provoked or another creature (or human) is in our territory. I have never killed a human (or any other creature for that matter, unless fish, mice, rats, lizards, frogs and insects count) before, and I don’t plan to, so that definitely proves that we aren’t blood-thirsty monsters.” I then asked if he was portrayed wrongly in most movies. “Yes and no,” he says. “Like I just said, we occasionally hunt when we’re hungry, but all T. rex have a softer side. My wife, Rachael will tell you that our species are great parents. We care for our young after they hatch and we even teach them how to hunt.” My last question for him was what he thought of his portrayal in the Jurassic Park trilogy. “Those are pretty accurate except for when they state that we T. rex lived millions of years ago,” Thomas answered. “We are not portrayed as pure evil monsters. While we are scary to humans in some scenes, our softer side is shown, especially in the second one where a pair is taking care of their few-week-old youngster.”

Jurassic Park, the first movie ever to portray dinosaurs pretty accurately

Our final interviewee is a little different from the others. While the others were complaining on how they were portrayed in movies, Gordon, the gorgonopsid is complaining on how she isn’t portrayed enough! “I’m a ferocious predator,” she says, “I have a pair of saber-teeth, strong legs and I’m fast. I don’t know why I’m hardly portrayed anywhere!” She also went on to explain that her species has been known for quite a while by scientists, but the general public can hardly pronounce her name. “It’s an insult,” Gordon continues. “I mean, everyone is so into dinosaurs, but they fail to realize how many other creatures God made for humans to enjoy and yet people hardly give us the recognition we’d like.” I then asked if she has been portrayed anywhere. “Sort of,” she paused. “The only times I’ve seen us gorgonopsids on a regular basis is in documentaries on the BBC or Discovery Channel. But that’s it. It’s like people are so attracted to dinosaurs, their own shadow casts down on me and my relations.” Hoping to end on a lighter note, I asked if there is any hope of her species coming out into public recognition. Her response was enlightening: “Yes actually. My species recently appeared in a television series on the BBC, I think it was called ‘Prehistoric’ or something like that. And we also have appeared in a 2012-2013 series called ‘Primeval: New World’ which is a spin-off from . . . oh! That’s the name of the other show: ‘Primeval’! So as I was saying, ‘Primeval: New World’ is a spin-off from Primeval, I can’t tell you whether I’d promote or not promote these programs because I haven’t really seen much of them yet, but at least we have an appearance in both programs, so maybe things are looking up for us gorgonopsids!”

A photo from Primeval, in this scene a gorgonopsid is fighting a weird-looking predator (this image came from this link)

So there you have it, the cunning revelations about creatures in cinema, coming from the animals themselves! So next time you visit the movie theater, please, spread the word of these animals’ plights so that maybe things will be on the bright side for these misunderstood critters!

Written by: Mr. Smiley

Photographer: Daniel P. Smithwater

Edited by: Christian Ryan

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The Case of the Giant (& Jealous) Greeny

Dr. Dodo confronting Arlene from the helicopter, she has turned from her greenish color due to Dr. Dodo's amazing speech (Mr. Fish can't be see, but he is present in the helicopter)

A lot of things happen here in Riverville, New York during the month of January. It’s just after New Year’s so everyone is naturally doing special things. For one thing, I can’t count the number of people who are making New Year’s resolutions that they aren’t even going to keep! Some people will have special dinners, some people will go out to eat, some people will be spending time with their family, some will be coming home after the ball drop and some will be celebrating their birthdays. Take Arlene McQueen for instance, she’s a normal-looking 11-year old girl who lives here in Riverville. She was out walking in the park one fine morning. Now this just so happened to be the same time Angel Stevenson was out walking. She was walking “her dog” named Fido (I put “her dog” in quotations because 1. It’s not her dog, it belongs to a girl she knows and 2. It’s not really a dog; it’s actually a guinea pig that behaves like a dog does, you know, she barks, she pants, she walks with a leash, she likes to take walks . . .). When Arlene saw Fido, she instantly fell in love with her. She wanted to keep it. “This girl was crazy,” says Angel. “I was merely taking Fido for a walk when this girl walks up to me and asks if she can keep her!” After Angel rejected the offer, Arlene’s reply was, “But it’s my birthday today.” Angel still refused. This is when Arlene shouted, “But I wan-it (want it)! Wan-it! Wan-it!” And something strange started to happen, with every “wan-it”, she grew bigger . . . and bigger . . .  and bigger . . . and BIGGER! Until she must have been at least 20 feet tall and her skin had turned a green color (sort of similar to either “green with envy” or the Incredible Hulk)! My trusty, junior photographer, Daniel P. Smithwater and I just so happened to be in the park at the time of the incident. So I was able to record everything. Daniel tried to get a few good pictures of her when she was green, but they all came out blurry. Arlene then surprised everyone by snatching poor Fido away from Angel and walking away with it. I know Angel very well, so since she didn’t have a cellphone, I quickly grabbed mine and called 9-1-1 (see, now I’m a hero!). The police came, but this was no good, as Arlene had since moved into town and started to take everything she wanted! Talk about violent! The police tried to stop her but they couldn’t either because they couldn’t use net guns (in code 1205973-09 it states that guns of any sort cannot be used when children are involved). We also tried to contact the girl’s mother’s number, but we couldn’t find it. Just when all hope seemed lost, Dr. Dodo and his best friend, Mr. Fred Fish from Animal Adventures Inc. (they both were in the paper a few weeks prior) happened upon the scene. Dr. Dodo is quoted for saying, “When I first saw that girl, I was like, ‘Whoa! Someone’s got some serious anger issues to let out!” So Dr. Dodo and Mr. Fish devised a plan. It was a plan that just had to work – deception. Deception has worked before, ever since the Garden of Eden when that serpent deceived Eve. However, unlike that scenario, Dr. Dodo and Mr. Fish weren't going to be untruthful. So they borrowed a relatively small helicopter and flew over to where Arlene was. This is when Dr. Dodo uttered a little speech:

"Honestly Arlene, look over here baby girl. Why are you taking other people’s things? Even if it is your birthday, other people have belongings that they are very fond of. And if you take them for yourself, you will only make other people sad. Have you ever heard the saying, ‘It’s better to give than to receive’? This is why instead of taking, we should give and therefore we get the satisfaction of making someone else feel better, just like God wants."

By the end of his little speech, Arlene was in tears and she suddenly shrunk back down to normal size and gave back the things she took. See, violence isn't always the answer to problems; sometimes all that is needed is just a few kind words to heal the wounds. Angel was relieved to have Fido back. Fido was especially glad to be out of the hands of that . . . "weird girl", so she wagged her tail (or what little bit of tail she did have, anyway). I then realized that Arlene hadn't gotten any presents for her birthday so when I asked if she was disappointed in not getting to keep any of the “presents” for her birthday, she said, “It’s ok, because my birthday is tomorrow!” I then asked why I thought it was today and her response was, “Oh, my Mom says EVERYDAY’S my birthday!!!” Oh no! I just hope Dr. Dodo’s words were inspirational enough to make Arlene see things a little differently!

Written by: Mr. Smiley

Photographer: Daniel P. Smithwater

Edited by: Christian Ryan

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